Read it, because it's the last one...

So i'm in china now studying abroad for a semester, and the internet over here is censored. Just getting through to this site is an accomplishment. anyway, It's been forever since i've been to my own blog, so i took the time to go back and read some posts from a year or two ago. While it was fun to go back and read all those pointless rants, i slowly began to sense this subtle feeling of disappointment. Generally when you look back on things you've written in the past, you expect to see some changes and improvements. but no, there were none. Not only was the writing bad, but each topic was progressively more pointless than the last. For a while i had this blog set to "private" so nobody could read it... but then i decided- what the hell. I also wrote a post about the latest girl, who was actually "theee" girl... for like almost a year. i left the post up partially because i want her to stumble across it someday, and partially for the same reason i've left all my posts up: i'm not proud, or impressed by anything on this site... but at one point in time it was what i thought. anyway, so here i am in china... learning chinese, but not speaking it so well yet. believe it or not, people don't speak english here. it's kind of refreshing to not have anyone to talk to. I think i've talked too much from the moment i learned how to speak. for once, i can just shut up and listen and think, and nobody will say "is something wrong"... because no, for once... there isn't. there's nothing to bitch about. there's a lot to think about, though. it's almost enlightening or something. anyway, i'll admit my last post was a bitchy one. this entire blog has become a bitchy one. so this is it. i know a sinking ship when i see one, and i'm getting the hell off. I just want it to go on record that i realize how terrible, trivial, and poorly written this entire collection of blogs has been. But however retarded it was, this is how i got "here" and if you don't like some of the posts... guess what? i don't either. but if i can deal with it, you can too.


my original post:
wow, this is strange. it's like walking back into your old room after 10 years...or something. anyway, i realize i haven't posted a blog on this site for over a year. I also realize that my last post was just me bitching about some girl. but you know what? i gonna do it again. so i've been fairly happily dating this girl for almost a year... maybe that's why i haven't been blogging. anyway, now i'm studying abroad in china, and about two weeks after i get here she decides it's too hard. c-o-m-e-o-n. seriously? ugh. anyway. i'm not really sure what i'm bitching about. it's not even a bad break up, it's just a lame break up. She is a bit younger than be, but she's already used up that excuse way too many times. people these days are just lame (no offense directed specifically at her... just people in general). So it's tough for a couple months... big deal. there was a time when guys would go out to sea, or to war, and they wouldn't come back (or even be able to write back) for years. but now-a-days there's just this general trend of pussy-ness. the divorce rate is freaking ridiculous... it's all about "what you want" and not "what you have". basically, i just can't say things like this directly to her because that would just be down right mean. but......uh. seriously? i'm freaking tired of this whole: "it's hard...i can't do it" thing. you know what? fucking tough it out... walk it off, champ. you don't know how good you have it, and when you think it's bad... just remember it can always get worse. that's a lesson for everyone. seriously america. come-on.
i'm not really mad... just disappointed
-steve

p.s. ok so there's no morals here, but in the heat of all this negative blogging i'd still like to say that this girl was amazing in a number of different ways. i hope she finds what she's looking for. i hope we all do.

nice guys finish last

well it's been at least 6 months since i bitched about anything on this site. anyway... last night i was playing through some songs i wrote a while ago and i kinda had a mini-flash back of my entire love life. i know i complain way too much about girls and life and such... but i think there's one girl that i didn't blog about yet. i didn't blog about her cuz i'm basically a nice guy and i didn't want to ruin her reputation or anything. don't get me wrong... i'm still a (somewhat) nice guy. i just think that enough time has passed that everyone has either lost interest in this blog, or doesn't know about this girl anyway. so here goes: one night, some chick (some rather attractive chick) that i had know for a few weeks, showed up drunk at my place. she wanted to sleep here rather than go to her room. keep in mind that i only have one bed* ok so i'm a nice guy and i say yes. but i'm not so nice as to give her the bed and sleep elsewhere. so we're both on my bed... she initiates the make-out session... and things progress. then she says she wants to lose her virginity... here.......now. as a typical nice guy response i said something like, “maybe you shouldn’t lose your virginity during you're first few weeks in college, to some guy you don't know so well, while you're ridiculously drunk”. with that said... the mood is killed, and we fall asleep. fast forward a year and a half: seen the girl maybe a dozen times... been avoided about 2 dozen times... and haven't talked to her since.

And now the moral of the story: nice guys get screwed. Will somebody please tell me why so many of you prefer guys that treat you like shit, over the nice ones? I’ve thought about becoming ‘that guy’ but I decided any girl who wants ‘that guy’ isn’t worth it anyway. I know--> typical nice guy logic.

-steve

oh god it burns!

i have one of those stories that you just can't make up. oh, that's right... it's that good. here goes: uh, i was filling my bike up with gas really late last night. as i leaned over to see how full my tank was... i lifted up the visor of my helmet... and just as this happend- the gas pump slipped out of my tank and sprayed me in the face. at this point you're probably asking yourself... hm, how does that feel? and let me just say... it burns like you wouldn't believe. so what do you do when you've gone temporarly blind at a gas station in the middle of the night with no one around? well first i turned the pump off* because the last thing we need is for my bike to burst into flames. Then i set the bike on the stand, took off my helmet and stood there for a good 30 seconds. however, my eyes were unable to tear do to the unfortunate evaporative effects of the gasoline. so, with every pore of my skin on fire, and 5% visibility, i did what i had to do... i spit in my hands and rubbed it into my eyes! i'm not even kidding here. i've heard that'll do the trick, and it really does work. anyways, that's my story... there's not really a moral here, except don't get gasolin in your eyes
-steve
p.s. the first thing i did when i got home was wash my face.. at least 5 times :)

learned a lesson... i think

so i got off work about an hour ago. i was completely tired from moving around non-stop all day. all i could think about doing while i was at work- was going to sleep, but on the ride home i decided to take the long way on the ol' bike. i went down some windy streets and then a couple long straight ones. there were no cars on the road, and i think i hit about 125mph (not bad for a 500cc!). then (at like 40mph) as i was taking a corner that lead back into my neighborhood, i hit a patch of dirt and slide a good 10 feet sideways and almost high-sided when my tires finally grabbed the pavement. so obviously that scared the crap out of me... and i was like "wow that was stupid, i almost wrecked my bike for no reason and i would have had a ton of roadrash because i was just wearing my helmet, t-shirt, and jeans." but now that i'm sitting here thinking about it... i think i would do it all over again. it's those little 20 minute adventures that make a day worth remembering. i've never thought of myself as and 'adrenaline junky' but i think i'm slowly coming to the realization that i need to do a few rediculously crazy things with my life to make it worth living. and i'm not talking about quick motorcycle rides throught empty streets... i'm talking about something bigger. i just don't know what yet... suggestions anyone?
-steve

europe so far:

ireland= done!
blogging from an internet cafe just isn't the same, but i'm trying to keep this page updated for all my loyal fans. (wait, fans?) anyways, i saw more rain in ireland in three days than i did in the last 3 months in arizona. the pubs are outta control! they have a crazy vodka drink that i can't even explain... but it's worth the trip. One thing to note* there were 2 (maybe 3 ) hot girls in ireland... and none of them were irish. but with so much beer, i guess all the girls look good. anyways, ireland= fun!

england=done!
the first night we got here every hostel was sold out, so we walked around till 3 in the morning and ended up sleeping next to the river. real sketchy. but now we're staying at the ashlee hostel and it's pretty good. i have a new drinking friend... or six. this one guy was from south africa, and he brought a bottle of "cane". so from what they say, "cane and coke" is what they drink in africa, and it gets you "boosed up right proper". and yes, yes it does. i would also like to quote that cane and coke is "some faulty shit". if it seems like i'm just drinking my way throught europe, you're right! it's sooo legal tough:) ok so far i've been hangin out (or drinkin with) with a few girls from canada, 3 guys from south africa, 2 guys from california, and no people from england. who would'a thought? anyways, all the tourists are really fun!


spain=done!
wow. just wow. barcelona is amazing! the beach is amazing. i don´t wanna sound shallow, but all i did was lay on the beach, drink, and watch really hot topless spanish girls. ýeah, i really don´t know what else i did. hm, things to note: maybe like two people speak english here. you don´t really know what you´re gonna get when you order food from a menu, but it doesn´t matter because the food is really good anyways. uh, yeah that´s it i guess. it´s really hard to sign into blogger when all the web pages are in spanish tho!

amsterdam=dude... i don't even know what's going on...
ok so amsterdam. what is there to say about amsterdam. um the police don't care if you smoke pot here. and uh, that can pretty much sum up amsterdam. Seriously, i can't even remember a good story right now. Oh i've got one: we stayed on a boat! yeah, instead of a hotel, we slept on this boat/hostle. the captain was awesome! he had a sweet dutch accent like 'gold-member' from austin powers. yeah "shmelting accident". anyways, um you can order pot from a menu in almost any cafe. i was offered coke and hash at least 500,00 times. If you ever go to amsterdam, i would suggest staying on a boat, and trying the 'silver haze'. it's a winning combo!! ok but my time in amsterdam is drawing to a close, and i no longer have an excuse to sit around all day with the munchies... so it's off to zurich next!

p.s. i don't know if it's staying on a boat, or smoking pot... but i swear this internet cafe is swaying back and forth. seriously... it's not even fun anymore. i've gotta get outta here :(


Italy- still here!
wow. i just typed for the last 10 minutes, and then the computer kicked me off. so now im gonna recap as fast as i can. here goes: in venice i saw serge and ella from school. that was cool. i am in cinque terra now, and earlier today i saw my math teacher from the u of a. that was also pretty cool. we are staying on the top floor of this old lady's house and it's pretty sweet. the beache is amazing. and i found out that my last name is prounced: free-go-na-zee. so there you have it! de home caantry is amazing!

-steve

europe...yes!

ok so i'm leaving for europe tomorrow morning. if you haven't heard the story... i'm basically backpacking with a friend all over europe. i have know idea what i'm actually gonna do, but i'm sure it will be awesome. i'll try to come back with a few good stories. other than that... see ya in a month!
-steve

Motorcycle Crash : (

alright, i'm switchin the topic back to motorcycles. The other day a kid from school asked me if i wanted to go riding. He just bought a brand spankin new 600cc gixxer. (That's my dream bike for the record). Anyways, it's like 9:30 at night, and we go for a quick ride down a winding road. We've never been on the road before, but we're still going pretty fast anyways. He was in front of me setting the pace. Maybe this is where i should mention an important piece of information. He has almost no riding experience! He's a nice kid and all, but he didn't even have his license or insurance. Anyways, we took a hairpin turn at like 65 mph and he couldn't stay in the lane. as he drifted to the outside of the turn he locked his back tire (bad!) and his bike high-sided. If you don't know what that means.. let me explain: the back end of his bike swung out to the left, then to the right, and back to the left. After this, the bike threw him over the handle bars. The bike hit a curb, did a flip in the air and landed in a ditch.
At about this point i hit my brakes pretty hard...but not hard enough to lock up my back tire. I pulled over to help him, but he was already standing up. He ended up breaking his collar bone... the bike was totaled, and the fire department had a nice chat with us.
So my our little ride took longer than i thought. On the way home (at like 1:00 am) i got to do a lot of thinking. My first thought was holy shit, what am i doing on a bike. then i thought about how he could have died if a car was coming in the other direction. But then i realized that this situation is exactly what i warn people about. What i mean is: i recognized the fact that he was on a bike that's really freaking fast, and he really doesn't have any experience at all.
So yeah- he crashed and it was pretty graphic to see when i was like 25 feet behind him... but it's also a really bad indicator of how dangerous motorcycles actually are. That accident came down to the rider. period. not the bike, or hazardous condition, or other cars... it was just the kid on the bike going way to fast.
Ok well i'll admit i was really scared right after the crash, but now i think i've considered every factor of the accident, and it really should be something that makes me scared to ride. The important thing is that the kid's alright (walking around with a limp, his arm in a sling, and a few bruises) but he'll live. If he wasn't wearing a helmet he would be either in the hospital, or in a graveyard. So what have we learned? wear the correct riding gear (duh), don't race down a road you've never been on while it's dark out (also duh), and don't ride past the level you're comfortable with (duh!). I guess i haven't really learned anything, cuz i already knew all that. but it's still a good lesson

-steve

p.s. the real victim here is the 2005 gixxer that's totaled. what a loss *hangs head in shame*